Saturday, September 13, 2008


I'm staying at my daughter's house this weekend. I have a big, ugly thing on my mind that I HAVE to think about and make a decision about. It's just horrible. It has left a big empty hole in my chest. Anyway, it's just consuming me but I was sitting in the family room with my granddaughter Mae. She's four and precocious. I know every grandma says that, but this kid really is. She's everything and everywhere advanced. Really tall, really advanced, just wired way differently. And cute, drop dead cute. Anyway, we're playing "Don't Spill the Beans". Remember that game? It's just her and I. Of course, she doesn't want to play the "regular" way. That's for suckers and 4-year-olds. We're different. We're rebels. We write our own rules. So, she says to divide up the beans and put the pot in the middle and start tossing the beans into the pot. Cool. So I start. Pretty soon, she has scooped up all the beans and the pot is in front of her. I'm sitting there like a schmo with a single bean and potless. So this conversation ensued:

Moo (me): Hey Mazie, you have all the beans and the pot is really close to you.

Mae: I know! It's fun! It means I'm winning! Look, I have EVERYTHING *big eyes and bigger smile*

Moo: Ummmm, but how is that fair to me?

Mae: Moo, you're just going to always have to try harder.

And so there it was. Yep. Always and forever try harder. It will never ever be easy. Never. It never has been and it never will be. No easy street for Moo, but that's okay. It just is. S'all good. I'm #2 and I try harder.

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