Sunday, October 4, 2009

A NAZI, A BIKE AND A HUSBAND WALKED INTO MY SELF-ESTEEM....

My physical therapist, the nazi, told me I have to start riding my bike. I told her I don't have a stationary bike, I only have the old fashioned kind, the kind that actually move forward as you pedal. I told her I could start walking every day. But she said, "No, I don't trust you to walk because your body will compensate for your atrophied tendons and you will favor your bad leg SO! I want you to ride your bike." Really? I have to ride a bike, huh?

I explained this to Peter. I said, "Honey, can you take the bike off of the balcony so I can ride it?"

Peter: Why?

Me: I have to do it for physical therapy. You know, my leg thingy.

Peter: Just walk.

Me: The nazi said I have to ride my bike.

Peter: Walking will work fine.

Me: No really! She said walking WON'T work and I have to ride the bike. I HAVE to! Can you just take it downstairs for me or would you rather I just do it? Cause if you're busy....

Peter: Don't lay a finger on that bike Deborah. I'll do it. Just tell me exactly what she said about the bike. Are you sure she said those words? Are you sure you're just not being overly-enthusiastic?

At this point I was just...annoyed. My impulse was to say, "That's right, honey. I WISH to ride my bike onto the really busy streets we live between in a neighborhood that I'm not entirely familiar with with a leg that doesn't exactly work. That's my DESIRE. That's what I really want. Could you enable that for me? Because that sounds like a fun afternoon."

Well, it's been several days and guess where my bike is?....yea....right up here on my balcony. I have an appointment tomorrow at 4:00 PM with the therapist and she's going to ask, "Did you ride your bike like we discussed?...like you said you would?...which is as good as giving your word!....which will stand as a witness against you on JUDGMENT DAY!....and I will say...

"huh,uh."

So, after pondering why my bike is still on the balcony, it comes down to 2 reasons WHY he hasn't taken it down there yet....

Reason 1: The idea that I wish to participate in something overtly athletic is so far out of the realm of possibility that Peter simply refuses to take it seriously or....

Reasons 2: He loves me so much and realizes how klutzy I am that he refuses to put me in harm's way by enabling that type of behavior by putting the bike downstairs where I could hurt myself.

He'll be home in a few minutes....I'll let him read this post and answer me for himself....but he's a wise man...any guesses on the answer?....

Yea, that was my guess too. The bike will be on the sidewalk by morning.

3 comments:

nancy said...

is that your physical therapist on that bike? if so, throw water on her next time.

The Katzbox said...

excellent strategy...

Chany said...

Ha ha ha- Thats funny :)